Saturday, December 31, 2011

My New Year's Revolution!


Today, I'm thinking about changing my ways.

In the last couple of days, all of my mates at day care have been yammering about resolutions. At first, I thought they were saying REVOLUTION. I googled  that on my iPaw and let me just say that i was all FOR it. When I realized my mistake, I googled this other word, RESOLUTION, and realized, well, that that was a different matter altogether and, can I just say,  far less inviting. But, still, maybe I'll give it a try. No one seems to understand that I don't really want to insist on playing ball 24/7, nor do I want to destroy every roll of toilet paper that isn't under lock and key or terrorize that walking squawking creature that my human refers to as Izzy. I'd really rather NOT have the occasional accident in the house, which inevitably leads to my name being taken in vain. I don't relish the taste of shoes, especially the European ones (they taste like chicken), and really, you can only baste so many rawhides in soil and bring them proudly to your owner's bed before it becomes tiresome. So, do I WANT to change? Sure, but this is my nature, and as they say, "A leopard can't change it's spots," and in this case, a golden can't change its, well, goldenness. With all that said, my New Year's revolution, er, I mean RESOLUTION, is to be true to myself...take me or leave me.

Friday, December 30, 2011

Mom, It's the simple things I love the most!



I love toys. I once heard my owner tell someone that she considers herself lucky if the toys she buys me last 3 days.  Now that may be true since I love taking apart things, really, to see how they work, how well they are put together and generally to challenge myself, as well as challenge that 3 day rule my human so proudly states.  Some may call it mass destruction, and that may be true, however, it really is a fun and my favorite kind of playtime.  
So, this past Christmas night, I was given a full stocking of toys!   I was determined that none of these balls, rope toys, stuffing filled birds, bears and whatchamacallits were going to survive for 3 hours, lest of all 3 days!  And I surely did!  Remnants of that silly porcupine vinyl chew toy were strewn in a matter of 5 minutes.  Every ball imploded in a matter of 30 minutes!  Even the so-called super tough, long lasting stuffed stick on a rope never made it to the dawn of the day after Christmas.  
Enough I must tell my owner!  Let me give you a little not so secret hint for future gifts.  Keep in simple!  You don't need to max out your credit cards to purchase toys for me that won't last more than 3 hours.  Can't you see, it's the simple, easy, everyday things that make me the happiest.  Give me old catalogs, paper cartons and boxes and I'll be amused for hours upon end.  I'll take a few of those sticks you gather for the fireplace kindling.  They can last for days and days.  And forget the paper shredder for all those old bills.  I'd love that job as the destroyer of all things not fit for other's to see.  I could work for the CIA with my destructive capabilities.  So, you see Mom, you don't have to worry about toys lasting longer than 3 days.  What I want is simple and cheap, and most of all, it let's me help out.  Cause, you see, I'm a golden girl.  And we goldens don't just want to have fun, we want to be useful too.  What's most important is that these simple things make me happy, and more importantly will make you happy too...especially cause they are free!  Oh, and don't forget that plastic bottle you just tossed into the recycling container...I'm a good crusher too!